The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
