Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
