I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Watching her eat just hurts me
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
