but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
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