so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
