All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
