I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Randomize
