You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
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