Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
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