would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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