And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
