just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
