I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
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