I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize
