I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
