shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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