That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
