i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize