you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Randomize
