We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I can't put those talents on a resume
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Randomize
