i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
