Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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