I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
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