well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
