i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
You left your underwear on the fireplace
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
