You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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