i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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