Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
i've created a new STD.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Randomize
