im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
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