Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Randomize
