Soap is not a condiment
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Randomize
