on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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