I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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