how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
What drink are we having for lunch?
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
