Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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