I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
