everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
It's shark week go big or go home
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Randomize
