If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
