yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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