the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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