office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
