I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
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