She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize