We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
vagina is talking i cant
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
