I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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