just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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