your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
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