im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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