i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
