I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
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