i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Randomize
